Stuff you need to get used to after you get married [WIT]

Getting used to marriage stuff
Wifey's "Intelligent" Thoughts

So you're newly married.

You're excited and you feel like you can conquer the new world.  But this could last for only a month.  Or a week.  As days go by you'll probably experience some discomfort--a gut feeling of "something's not right". Or just be outright annoyed and frustrated.  Here are my top 6 things that I needed to get used to:

1. In-laws. (Oh, especially if you live with them.)  Unless they're absentee in-laws or angels.  But more often than not, you'd have to be OK with having two new "angels" peering over your shoulder, making sure everything's alright, or all right.

2. Sleeping with someone on the same bed.  (I didn't expect this, especially since we were all lovey-dovey and eager to, you know, sleep together.)  If you know the fairy tale entitled The Princess and the Pea, it's like that.  You can't sleep because something feels different, but you can't seem to put your finger on it.  Or maybe you're about to fall asleep but you suddenly spring back to consciousness because you're not used to the bed bouncing a little whenever your spouse moves or rolls to the other side.  So go get a king size bed, with a sturdy mattress, especially if one of you likes to roll around while sleeping.  But if you have no choice, then a queen is fine.  Use pillows as your shield.  Then--thank God--at some point you'll get used to it, and it will actually feel weird when he's not sleeping beside you.

3. Your spouse's snoring.  Unfortunately, some people never get used to this.  Luckily for me, I can somehow carry on and wear imaginary ear plugs.  Although there are times when I get disturbed by hubby's snoring, I just push him a little, or move him to his side and, behold, the snoring stops.  For a while.  Then it continues.  But the peaceful silent period between the last snoring and the next snoring gives me a window of opportunity to fall fast asleep, or at least to be too sleepy to mind some rhythmic, ambient sounds.  The next line of defense would be for the non-snorer to wear the actual earplugs, or earphones to listen to relaxing music.  But if all these fail and the case is really bad, it's time for the snorer to see a doctor.

4. Your spouse's bathroom habits.  One is the classic toothpaste story.  My story has a slightly different version--hubby leaves the cap open, and I find myself closing it most of the time.  (The good thing is, none of us gets bothered when it's not nicely squeezed out till the end.  Hehe.)  Another thing is that I had to get used to putting the toilet seat down from its "up" position, since I grew up with the toilet seat down all the time.  I would hear my mind say, "Why do I have to do this all the time?  Why can't hubby do it himself?"  Thus, a compromise is in order.  For example, "I'll be OK with putting down the toilet seat if you remember to close the toothpaste cap."

5. Cleaning up someone else's mess.  It has just dawned on me now that there are twice more dishes to wash and twice the amount of hair that falls on the floor.  Basically, consider the amount of effort that you put in chores, then multiply that by 2.  Suddenly, your free time shrinks and you have less time for Facebook (which has been reduced by 50%).

6. Bodily excretions and your five senses' possible encounter with them--first thing in the morning when you wake up, after meals, at bedtime, or any time without prior notice.  Just deal with it.  It's the only way humanity can evolve.

So those are my top 6.  The good thing about getting used to these eventually is that they cease to be irritating.  Love is a muscle.  You train it. You get training pains as expected, but eventually you'll get used to the sores after each workout.  Your muscle gets stronger, well-defined, and worthy of winning medals.

Caveat: If one or both spouses are super stressed out, hungry, fatigued, or PMS-ing, then these issues will, more likely than not, resurface. And non-issues will become super-issues.  Please remember that in these cases, the afflicted should be given proper treatment and relief, before being judged and sentenced to one night of sleeping on the couch. It is best to prevent these untoward incidents by making sure that each one is not hungry, sleep-deprived, stressed, or in pain.

I'm sure couples out there have other stuff they've needed to adjust to after getting married--aside from the ultimate, life-altering change of having children, of course.